“If only I could get that job.”
“If only I had a pool in my backyard”.
Then what? – you would live the perfect life? The world would cater to your desire for this happiness and mold its way to your liking? That’s highly improbable. The world doesn’t work tirelessly to fit our needs/wants to give us what we desire. We’re here to take from the world what we can to receive pure happiness. It’s this difference in ego that can make us either helplessly searching for an imagined future happiness, or content with where we are in life.
Life isn’t some bully trying to push you down. Even if a tree branch breaks and falls on your car in a storm. “Agh why did this happen to me?!” – it didn’t happen to you, that is your ego speaking. Sure it’s your car but some mystical force didn’t pick you out of spite and purposely tried to harm you. Instead of trying to turn everything in life aiming back at you, whether good or bad, sometimes it’s better to see the reality of it. “A tree fell on my car cause of the storm. Sure I’m upset over the damage but accidents happen.” By sometimes subconsciously letting your ego relate everything back to you, the truth of what’s really going on is lost, where your biased mind skews the truth of it to make your perception seem like fact.
In such a random and sometimes unfortunate world, by personalizing everything, your mind is clouded with stress and pity for yourself. To dwell in your mind, considering yourself as the recipient or some action, you miss out on the reality of it, the true un-wavering, concrete, reality that life isn’t out to get us or to cater to us. You plan tirelessly for days to plan a high school reunion or junior high school reunion, and then despite your hours of work, it begins to heavily rain the day of. “Agh why does it have to rain on the day I planned all of this out for? Now everything is ruined.” Really? The clouds chose to rain during your picnic just to hurt and inconvenience you? Astonishing! The chance that it rained does ruin the plans, but it’s a lot easier to accept and deal with it if you can take it for fact and reality instead of letting your ego direct everything back to you, as if the world is against you in some way.
P.S: Not easy at all to do. I’m working on this.